But Have Not Love...

 

If I am called in the middle of the night for crises, and asked to sit in the counseling offices or emergency rooms of other's pain, but have not love, I am nothing.  

If I write a New York Times bestseller and get invited to speak on podcasts and at conferences, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging symbol.

If I am a respected leader and admired activist, a certified foster parent and a specialist in trauma, but have not love, I am nothing.  

If I lead ministries, launch multiple organizations and sit on community boards, but have not love, I am nothing.  

If I sacrifice a life of ease and dedicate my life to serving the poor and oppressed and underpriveleged, but have not love, I gain nothing.  

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1 Corinthians 13 feels so real to me right now.  I in no way think that I check all the boxes up there, or that I ever will.  But I can see the temptation, in this ministry world, to think "if I just do enough".  Accomplishments in the sphere of ministry and influence can be just as alluring as riches and celebrity.  

Be ware, lest we be like the rich man who thinks all these have I kept.  Yes, we may not be building barns for our excess wealth, but just as much as that man did, we can think we are good apart from Christ.  

I have tasted enough of volunteerism and service, to know that my heart will not change just by going through the motions.  My resume will not change my reasons.  My ministry will not change my motives.  I need Jesus to come in and give me faith working through love.  

He keeps shifting my goals: to less impressive outwardly, and more simple and straightforward for my heart.  The harder goals..

Help me want Jesus in everything. And help me love with his love.  

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If I reach the end of my life and I've launched foundations and adopted a small army and written a library of books, that means nothing.  But if I reach the end of my life and I can look the person in front of me in the eyes, and know they are valuable and care about their soul and their suffering, then I have inherited the greatest treasure.  

Only in Jesus, can I keep meeting with people in crises and witnessing the dark corners of neighborhoods and hearts, and not become hardened. 

Only in Jesus, can I forge ahead in the world of high-risk families and not become hopeless or prideful.

Only in Jesus, can I get up out of my bed again, to prop up a coughing child when no one is looking, and not need acknowledgment or relief.  Because I have love.  

Jesus, I want to follow you.  I want your true patience and kindness and hope and truth.  I see that apart from you, I cannot love people.  Help me love you. Help me love others.  These truly are the greatest commandments, and the greatest gifts.